When did I all religeous and shit???
I am in an incredibly boring class for the rest of the week. I will probably be posting frequently.
SO I went down to Austin as I said earlier with a friend of mine. It really did not go all to well. She was, to put it mildly, a bitch most of the weekend. So that was a bit of a turn off.
But the real problem that I had that kept hitting me at the weirdest times was the thought that kept piercing through my mind….
You are a married man…..You are not with your wife….This is WRONG!!!
Now I have never been that religious of a person. I know that I regularly have broken many commandments and all that. I was just very surprised that I was hit with this wave of morality, at; well let’s face it, a rather inopportune time. The entire weekend was supposed to be a weekend of carnal pleasure; A weekend of fleshy desires.
I was supposed to get laid……Multiple times.
And then I started thinking. This particular friend and I have not fucked in a while. A long while. We have been seeing each other, but for whatever reasons (on the last few weekends) the sex thing has not happened. Seeing how I just see her as a friend with benefits (Or a Beneficial friend?)
Have my morals been getting in the way theses other times? More importantly, what do I do about this? Will a divorce help? Am I ready to get a divorce? Should I go to counseling? More drinking? I always like that solution. May not be the answer, but it sure helps me forget all the questions………
I do not think a divorce is the right answer. It is just a piece of paper. I need to be unmarried in my mind and my heart. But I do not know if I am ready to let her go. I may not ever be ready to let her go. I also may make the decision to let her go, but never move to someone else.
I know how I feel. I know what I believe. And right now, I will follow the advice of the great American philosopher W.C. Fields…..
It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it. —W. C. Fields"Everybody needs to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer." – W. C. Fields
