More on the Dream…
I am sure that I am putting way too much thought into what was a simple day dream. But there was just something about it that was so different. I think it was that there was as much emotional passion involved as physical passion. There were also no worries about whether I could satisfy her. I never worried about doing anything that she did not want. I did not worry about being too quick.
Thinking more about it, maybe that it what it was all about. Since it was a dream, (and we can be anything or anyone we want in our dreams) I felt absolutely no pressure to perform. In this particular situation, I felt that it was all about and totally about me being satisfied and satiated.I do not think I am very good in bed. Let me restate that, I have been informed by multiple partners, that while I have some talents and do some things very well, I am a pretty bad fuck. Fact of the matter is, is that I have premature ejaculation on a very regular basis. And it is obvious a mental thing. I can go for quite a long time with foreplay or even oral action, but once the actual intercourse start; well that does it. We go in…..we go off.
It is rather embarrassing. Hell let me rephrase that, it is fucking humiliating. I have even forgone sex so I would not have to deal with it. I have tried creams. I have tried the deadening rubbers. No luck.Ah…….Then there was this dream. This one wonderful dream. This dream was so realistic everything felt real. It felt like it was actually happening, even if the whole time I knew it was a dream. At no time did I feel any pressure to please her. There was no stress on whether I would be able to perform. Wow…..There is an eye-opening statement. I just realized that even in my fantasies, I was putting pressure on myself to “do it right”.
What I think I will try and figure out next, is that was I that at ease with everything due to it being a dream, or was it the person I seemed to be dreaming about. Was it the action or the person? Or does it matter?
Or, once again, am I putting way to much thought into a simple day dream fantasy?